This question came in after my recent post about moving forward after a toxic boss.
While the post contained 4 tips about building a new relationship, I wanted to address this one in its own post.
The first thing I think is important is to recognize that "your guard" is not binary. It's not up or down. Your guard can be a high, impenetrable wall or it can be a low garden fence. It could be a chain link fence, or it can be topped with barbwire.
With that in mind, what "wall" did you build to protect yourself from the previous toxic boss, and is it possible to bring it down a little bit as you start working with your new manager? Would adding an open gate be helpful?
After working with a toxic boss, it's understandable to want to protect yourself, and you should. Look to start lowering your guard by establishing trust. Stephen Covey in "The Speed of Trust" notes that trust is built from both Character and Competency.
Character - You do what you say, and Is there a hidden agenda?
Competency - Are the skills and capabilities to do the job present, and what is the track record?
Look around. Be aware. See how others work with your new manager and if trust is being built, little by little let down your guard.
Great relationships don't have walls.
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